Aside from the waxing moon perched in the corner of a stark and cloudless sky, my headlights were the only source of comfort as the gravel drive sucked me toward that moment of confrontation.
Solitude.
What would I find?
What will it be like to be tucked away in a cabin in the hills, alone, with God for 24 hours..?
And why did I drive out here so late at night?
An alarming shrill scurried up my back as the headlights penetrated the blackened windows and revealed the lonely stature of the last cabin on right, whose only sibling loomed just beyond the reach of what was uncovered by my own hi-beams.
I crept into the driveway slowly, peering intently past the glare on the windows into what would be my dwelling for the next 24 hours.
Alone--like this little cottage who stood empty at the end of a gravel road niched deep into the hills--my only hope was that God might dwell in me as I this cabin.
But what lurks inside..?
I immediately dismissed my fearful hesitancy as childishness and smothered it with the all the confidence I could muster from the noble nature of my mission. WIth that confidence I popped open the door and marched into the entry way, simultaneously flinging the light on. I brought in all my stuff and dropped it in the main central room. But as I shut the door behind me, my sensed heightened and a primal awareness came upon me...
I was not alone.
The hair on my neck stood up as my fight-or-flight instincts overthrew every logical explanation of my fear. Adrenaline coursed through my body and I froze.
Knees bent, I stepped tenderly into the kitchen to grab a weapon. Just as I reached over the sink, I was instantly frozen at the sight of two, tarantula sized Hobo spiders nestled in drain cover! It took several moments to realize that these spiders were mere carcasses. But this was no friendly cabin, I had been swallowed by the jaws of a Hobo Spider nesting ground!!
I proceeded out into the living room, stopping to frantically bat away the single web strand that grazed my cheek. And as I turned the corner....there is was...
The Mother of all Hobo Spiders.
The Big Boss.
Perched in the crevice of the sliding glass door.
Staring at me.
Plotting against me.
In a fraction of a second I debated leaving.
Leaving this not-so-sacred dwelling to be ruled by the evil 8-legged predators.
But my primal man-fight mechanism launched into action from deep within.
I WILL BE THE MASTER OF THIS HOUSE!!!
So in one subtle yet swift movement, I stepped back, tore a paper towel from the roll and re-approached the wooly mammoth.
"DDHAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEYYYAA
AA!!!!" I roared, with a Bruce Lee type of fury as my hand struck down, at lightening speed, squarely on the body of the hairy little bastard. I pulled it paper towel together on itself and pinch-squeezed it with every ounce of strength I possessed.
I am a killer.
I let out a huge sigh as I deposited it in the garbage and the next 20 minutes turned into a Kill Bill style killing spree, leaving SIX hobo spiders dead, along with the four dead ones I found.
Victory.
So after my SWAT Team duties were complete I sat, mourned briefly for the casualties, and then rested in peace.
"Oh God that you would dwell in me as I in this house"
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